God Save the Queen
I AM, as I might have told you, not a political bird. I am a flightless, mindless bird. I have no wings. Therefore, I can't fly. I have no brain. Therefore, mind-boggling developments don't boggle me. Unfortunately, I have a pair of eyes and a pair of ears. Therefore, I can see and I can hear and I can read. Especially the writing on the wall.
I can read newspapers and can watch television, particularly Pakistan Television, which is the best network in the world. And on PTV , I like Khabarnama the most; because of its incredible consistency. You may not believe it, but it gives the same blessed news every blessed evening with minor variations towards the end, and wonder of wonder, it records temperatures across the country and it makes weather forecasts.
Last night, the Khabarnama went like this:
Assalam-o-Alaikum, here is the news read by no-one in particular:
The Queen had a three-hour meeting with the Sultan of Oman.
The Queen returned to Islamabad this afternoon after a three-day state visit to Oman.
The Queen receives the President of Tajikistan at the Islamabad Airport.
The Queen discusses matters of mutual interest with the Tajik President .
The Queen to visit Gojra early next year.
The Queen presides over a meeting of the economic coordination council.
The Queen says Pakistan is taking the drug problem seriously.
The Queen says Pakistan will never cap its nuclear programme.
The Queen says there is no price problem in Pakistan .
The Queen says Pakistan will never change its stand on Kashmir .
The Queen says the Opposition is undemocratic.
The President receives the Sultan of Oman.
The President returns to Islamabad after a brief visit to Lahore .
The President receives the Tajik President at Islamabad Airport.
The President discusses matters on mutual interest with the Tajik President.
The President says support to Kashmiris will continue.
The President says Pakistan will never cap its nuclear programme. It will only hat it.
The President says Pakistan is taking the drug problem seriously.
The Sindh Chief Minister says his Government will crush all miscreants with an iron hand.
The Punjab Governor says he will teach the Opposition a lesson.
The Punjab Chief Minister says the Opposition will never succeed in its machinations.
And here the Khabarnama petered out into sports and the weather.
I met a top PTV executive the other day, and complimented him on his network's wonderful credibility. " Nothing new in it, old chap. We went into business in 1964, and we have maintained our consistency for a full 30 years. And we are determined to continue to serve our viewers truthfully, faithfully ." I wished him godspeed.
* * * * *
The prices of wheat have been increased recently. A 10-kilogram bag of wheat flour has gone up from Rs. 46 to 56, which is to say by Rs. 1 per kilogram. The prices of flour products, though, have risen astronomically. Qulcha (or short naan , if you like) has gone up from Rs. 1.50 to Rs. 2.50 while plain naan and roti have gone up by one hundred percent-from Rs. 1 to 2.
Consider the impact of this shattering increase on a poor man's budget . Take the example of the smallest family-man and wife with no children and no other dependents. Let us also suppose that both man and wife are extremely frugal in their eating habits. They only have plain tea for breakfast, and they eat just one roti each per meal per day. This means 120 roti s per month for the couple. Last month, it cost them Rs. 120. Now they will have to spend Rs. 240.
Let us now suppose the two take a qulcha each for breakfast. This will cost them another Rs. 150 per month. Add this to roti bill and it comes up to Rs. 390. Nearly four hundred rupees for bread alone. No butter, no eggs, no milk, no mutton, no vegetables, no sweets, no fruit. Four hundred rupees for bare bread.
If the couple wants a little bit of butter, some eggs, some milk, some mutton, some vegetables, some sweets, and some fruit their food bill could easily triple to Rs. 1,200. Add to this the sympathetic increase in the prices of all these items and food for two could easily mean Rs. 1,500.
What about house rent, electricity, water, gas, clothing and travel? Everything has gone up and will go up further. When wheat goes up, everything else goes up. The government , related as it is to Hatim Tai, has very graciously announced a fifty-rupee allowance to offset the impact of the increase in wheat prices. This is not even a bad joke. It is an insult to the people.
Take now the case of a large family-grandparents, parents and, six growing children-ten people in all. What will they eat, quantitatively and qualitatively? As it is, most people, especially those living in the countryside, are undernourished. The current spurt in prices will add to malnutrition across the country.
Underfed children are much more prone to disease than those brought up on a balanced diet. So this will create health problems. Again, the mental faculties of a growing child are impaired by under nourishment. This will create its own problems. Already, the average national I.Q. is not very high. It will fall further.
I am not a very superstitious man but I am beginning to feel that the Bhutto family is jinxed. Sir Shahnawaz Bhutto was the Prime Minister when India annexed Junagadh. Mr. Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto was Foreign Minister when Pakistan went war with India in 1965. He was Yayha Khan's Deputy Prime Minister and Foreign Minister when Dhaka fell in 1971.
When Mr. Bhutto became the Chief Martial Law Administrator-President and then Prime Minister , he did not have one single day of peace in office-the POWs problem, disastrous floods in 1973 and 1974, the earthquake in the Northern Areas the post-Middle East war inflation from 1973 onwards, and you name it. In the end, the gallows.
And now Benazir Bhutto : unfair dismissal and great personal suffering in 1990, mounting economic and political problems in 1993. May God have mercy on her. She needs it.
Friday, April 1, 1994
